Okay, so we live in a world where the line between the sexes gets thinner and thinner each year. While in some ways I’m all about that, in other ways I find it a bit disappointing and disheartening.
One of the wonderful things about being a woman is being made to feel like a woman.
Just like guys like to feel strong and masculine and needed, I think the majority of women like to feel special and valued and taken care of.
Yes, I know, don’t they say chivalry is dead? Well, chivalry is not dead. And if it is for you, I’m here to resurrect it.
Where’s my defibrillator?
We need to kick some life back into the concept of chivalry and I’m here to give you some suggestions for how to do it.
I often joke around with the ladies that if they want to make a point with their man to lay it out like a bulleted list. Most guys don’t want a dissertation—just get down to the brass tacks.
Well, that’s what I’m going to do here.
Show Her Chivalry Is Not Dead
Here’s how to be her knight in shining armor without spending a dime:
- Say please and thank you and you’re welcome.
- Tell her at least once a day that she’s beautiful or you like her dress or she has deliciously kissable lips or some other delightful compliment.
- Let her order first in a restaurant, or, if you know what she wants, order for her.
- If you are sharing a bottle of wine, pour her glass first and then offer to refill it when it’s getting low. If you are at a restaurant, make sure the server pours her wine first. If he/she doesn’t, give your full glass of wine to your sweetie and take her empty glass. That’ll also let your dope of a server know that ladies come first, dammit! (I’ve been a server before, so no yelling at me—I knew to always serve the ladies before the guys.)
- If you are walking down a sidewalk by a street, make sure that she is on the inside. Yep, that means that you get hit by a car first, but since the chances of that are slim, put her on the inside and say something like, “You go on this side honey…I wanna keep my girl safe.” Or some such thing. Chicks love that stuff!
- If she smokes, light her cigarette. Or better yet, if you smoke too light hers in your mouth and then pass it over to her.
- Don’t be a dick (Oops! Did I just say that? Shame on me.), raise your voice or call her unpleasant names. I gotta tell you, those things turn me from sweet to bitch in 2 seconds flat and I know I’m not the only one. A lot of chivalry isn’t just actions, but words. Being kind is a wonderfully chivalrous thing.
- Always open the door for her and let her walk through first.
- Open the car door for her, let her get in, and then close it for her—this will stun her.
- If you really want to blow her mind, pull out the chair for her when you are out to dinner. She’ll wonder if the Pod People have kidnapped the real you and replaced you with some incredible clone that looks like you and smells like you, but who also got a degree in kick ass chivalry.
If you can just do some or all of those 10 things your girl is going to think she’s died and gone to Heaven.
Being treated like a princess makes most women feel loved and cherished and appreciated, and trust me—all those happy feelings you create will be their own reward as she likely be so thrilled by your kindness that she’ll return it in a yummy, clothes-off kind of way.
Now, granted, there are women who are like, “I can open my own damn door!”
Ugh. What a mess.
Typically that kind of attitude stems from either never having anyone do anything kind for them before so they don’t know how to handle it—it makes them uncomfortable. Or, they think they are being progressive feminists.
[alert type=”info”]As a side note to the ladies: letting a man do wonderful things for you doesn’t make you weak or less-than, it shows that you know you are worth the effort he’s putting in to make you feel special. That is a beautiful thing.[/alert]
If you happen to have a woman like that, I suggest slowly easing into the above list. Just one thing at a time, then a few months later add in another item from the list.
Sometimes it just takes a girl time to get used to being treated like a lady. That’s sad to say, but true.
See, Chivalry Is Not Dead!
When it comes down to it, men and women are different. And that’s not just okay, it’s good. Understanding how the opposite sex likes to be treated is a great step towards a wonderful relationship.
Typically, men like to open the hard-to-open jars, and a good woman will let you and then coo over how strong you are.
Women, on the other hand, often like to feel like their man is taking care of them (whether they admit it or not), so open the door for her and make her feel special. It doesn’t cost you one red cent but can make a huge difference in the way she views you and your love for her. What an easy way to show her just how special she is.
Oh, and as an extra incentive, I have a guy friend that tells me that his wife of 15 years still happily performs oral sex because he treats her like such a queen that she, “Wants him to feel like a king.” Not even kidding. How’s that for spending no money and getting an awesome reward?
As always, I wish for you love, joy and happy humping!
“The real lover is the man who can thrill you just by touching your head or smiling into your eyes, or just by staring into space.” –Marilyn Monroe
Sex: How to Get More of It (for the guys) and Intimacy: How to Get More of It (for the ladies). She’s also contributed to Playboy radio on the topics of sex, love and relationships. Check out her blog and be sure to follow her on Twitter @JodiAmbrose.Jodi Ambrose is our sex expert here at The Acquiring Man, author of