In a hectic dating world it can be difficult to make a lasting impression with her. Do you know what takes to leave a lasting impression? Let’s take a look at the specific areas that can help you become unforgettable to her.

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1) Appearance Matters

Before she gets to know you she will see you. In countries like Japan people focus on appearance, but in the states you’ll find socks with flip flops or even worse – green and yellow chipped toenails with bed slippers, shorts and a “just got laid” t shirt.

With the bar set so low it’s easy for you to make a good first impression simply by actually trying. It pains me that I actually need to remind you to shower, wear deodorant and brush your teeth but I’ve learned not to take these things for granted.

Also, carry around mints, use white strips when needed, and wear flattering comfortable clothes that weren’t recently attacked by moths. How you present yourself is more important than how symmetrical your face is.

2) Be Interesting and Engaging

Once you’re actually engaging in a conversation you’ll be surprised by how much of your physical appearance becomes irrelevant. Don’t try too hard to impress her because that comes across as obvious.

Women aren’t as visual as you are so the cards you’re playing with now are you abilities, experiences, and banter. Regardless of what you look like on the outside you need an emotional appeal. Something that isn’t tangible that makes the other person want to know more.

Having an interesting story and providing value will get you farther than a pretty face will. Learn about what books she likes, and the movies she’s seen.

What has she done that she would never do again?

What is something she has never done but wishes she could?

What would she do if she won the lottery?

Ask her open-ended questions – these are the types of questions that make her think and can’t be answered with yes or no. Most importantly listen and pay attention to her answers.

3) Work on Developing Yourself

Your brain can get you laid. You don’t need to know it all but you should know some things extremely well. We don’t just go to school because our parents make us. Nothing on this earth is sexier than an intelligent mind.

If school has never been your thing don’t give me the “it’s too late” speech. I’m getting my masters in clinical psychology right now and my mom who is 60 just got her phd.

You don’t have to take this route, but you can take a class or two or pick up a book or a new hobby. You need to make your mind an interesting place to live. Your witty one liners will only get you so far.

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4) Be Sociable

Having good social skills is important in the world. With texting becoming our preferred method of communication it’s getting harder to respond on the fly. We have grown accustomed to taking the time to think about what the appropriate response should be, which is baffling to me since I still get a stead stream of “whatcha doin?” messages. Their lack of effort means even a little effort on your part makes you stand out.

Practice starting a conversation with 3 people every time you go out. There doesn’t need to be any special intent besides working on your ability to improve your response time and in-person interactions.

5) Be Authoritative

We all know women are suckers for power. What people fail to see is although it can be purchased it can never be fully attained without inner power and the inner power has the strength to over ride what ever it is you might not have.

The charisma is what makes you a powerful magnet and being an authority in what you do and how you feel about your self is key. What gives you an aura of strength is reflecting and allowing yourself time to grow when/if you mess up. Don’t run to the nearest bar to sulk, just think about what went wrong and contemplate what you can say and do differently next time.

Think about how others are affected by you and try to see the situation from as many sides as possible. It may seem like work at first but these are where the moments of growth are created, and it is in them that you become someone who truly enjoys his own company.

6) Be Independent

Someone who can’t be alone with their own thoughts is scary to others. If you don’t want to be around or enjoy being with yourself, why would anyone else? Don’t be needy and clingy – that is one way make a lasting impression with her, but in the WRONG way!

Practice being present when you speak. Confidence comes with being happy and in living in the moment.

If you’ve read the Power Of Now (aff link) you’ll recall the importance of being present in the moment.

It’s becoming more difficult with modern demands and technology but when mastered you will become more desirable and time will slow down for you.

7) Be Secure

When you’re walking down the street and see someone looking down – smile.

When you see the girl arguing on her phone, smile. Just a quick 1 -2 second – smile.

You make things difficult by telling yourself that things are difficult. Secure individuals are happy with themselves and who they are.

These techniques are and true and you can make them work for you to make a lasting impression with her. Incorporate them into your life and Tweet me to tell me about your successes!

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Our sex columist, Erika Jordan, is also a prolific actress and glamour model. Follow her on Twitter @Erika4Jordan, Instagram @ErikaJordan, and visit her personal page ErikaJordan.net or misserikajordan.com a site made for the fans by the fans! 

Photography by Thomas O’Brien Commercial Photography